Thursday, 27 August 2009

Heart to heart about my superheart

I was flipping through a little pocket book of 40 hadith, that was given to me as a gift from a friend.

My favourite one is always and always hadith number 42.

But tonight, my mind keeps coming back to hadith 27 that goes like this:

Wabishah bin Ma'bad ra berkata:
Aku datang kepada Rasulullah SAW. Baginda bersabda, "Adakah engkau datang untuk bertanya tentang kebajikan?". Aku berkata, "Ya."

Baginda bersabda,

"Bertanyalah kepada hatimu. Kebajikan adalah apa yang menjadikan tenang jiwa dan hati, sedangkan dosa adalah apa yang menggelisahkan jiwa dan menimbulkan keraguan dalam hati, meskipun orang-orang terus membenarkanmu."

As simple as that...

It struck me hard. The fact is, really...I KNOW when i'm doing right and when i'm doing wrong. No matter what people may say.

I dont need to read books and learn extensively to tell what's right from wrong.

I was born with a heart. A superheart. Subhanallah...that I should always listen to.

My heart spoke, "so who is to blame when you still want to harm yourself?"

I pondered.

Allah loves you, that He gave you your heart.

"Kenape aku tak sayang diri aku sendiri selame ni. Sdgkan aku tak sanggup ke neraka."

Tuesday, 25 August 2009

Colours and music

who says the blind do not want to know about colours, or the deaf about music?

tell it the way they can understand for beauty is for everyone.

Monday, 24 August 2009

Facing consequences

Treat others the way you want Allah to treat you.
For He
will treat you the way you treat others.

So, when someone is wronged and he...

..forgives and be kind, he really isn't being stupid.

And when someone is wronged and he...

..decides to become patient rather than to act upon anger, he isn't admitting weakness.

He is only getting forgiveness, kindness and support from Allah, the Almighty for Allah is always with the patient people.

When all our enemies, our family and friends have died, and whatever we fight for has vanished...

..and only heaven and hell are in front of us..

Wouldnt how Allah wants to treat us be the only thing that matters to our poor sinful soul?

Let's knock ourselves out having the kindest of hearts and face the consequences later. =p

Friday, 21 August 2009

Questions asking for answers..

Why do i look for peace and relaxation in chaos and noise.

Why do i look for happiness where depressed people become more depressed.

Why do i ruin myself in my effort to fix what is wrong with my life.

Where do people go to be happy...

p/s i seem to worry my friends abit. "i" in this entry is only for the sake of empathizing with what i want to write about my surrounding. =)

Tuesday, 18 August 2009

the KIUTness of terengganu!!

KIUT stands for keen's teachers.

There are kiutors, who are overseas univ students and there are kiutees. Our kiutees are 11 year old pupils dari kelas plg terkebelakang in a rural area school.

KIUT MIUT programme is where kiutors Meet, Interact, Understand and Train the kiutees. Meeting the students isnt the essential part of the prog. One meet, and then communication continues via letters and postcards between kiutors and kiutees.

We aim to provide strong and continuous motivation and support to these children since they are still very young.

"melentur buluh biar dari rebungnya." "mencegah lebih baik dpd mengubati" kata org.

They still have a large capacity to thrive, however left behind they are now. Insha Allah.

Me n my team chose Terengganu.

SK Bukit Losong's last standard 5 class, 5 Akrab.

We decided to meet the kids. psyched!!! XD

KFC lunch with the kiutees~ semua tesipu2 lg, belang belum nampak!

We kicked off in the computer lab. Videos, songs and our picture slides of life in the UK. The kids got excited~

"Siaaapa jumpa Losong dalam world map ni???"

Yg angkat tgn ni bkn yg jumpa Losong dlm world map, tp yg minat Manchester United. =P
"Nanti saya nak pergi sini."

"Abang kecik2 dulu dok tahu buat mende gi skoloh. Gi balek maen gi balek maen. Dpt UPSR corot,baru nak temenung. Ni abang nok kabo pengalamang abang sendiri...."

Fuh, Salam hebat gile. Even managed to capture the naughty ones attention!

Had a chance to pray Dzuhur and Asr with our kiutees. Our prayers for all these lovelies.


Assalamualaikum ^_^

Apa khabar hari ini?

Seronok dapat berkenalan dengan awak =)

Nama awak siapa?

Awak darjah berapa?

Pada waktu lapang, apa yang paling awak suka buat?

Nanti dah besar, awak nak jadi apa?

Banyak betul tanya abang/kakak ni. Hehe. Balaslah nanti bila senang. Dan tanyalah pula apa yang adik nak tahu tentang abang/kakak. =)

Belajar rajin-rajin. Jaga diri dan jaga solat ye!

Yang seronok dapat berkawan dengan adik,

Abang/ Kakak.

A letter received by each pupil to start off KIUT programme.

Kiutors had to assist the children to reply to the abang kakak as not all can spell and write well. Their letters will fly with us to the UK to be handed to the kiutors so KIUT can kick off~...chomel kakak ni XD.

Take a break, with some cartoons =D

Dah petang, takkan tak gi main! Game ni nama dia sukakuiz. dah bawak bola pingpong guna sudu sampai depan ade kuiz pulak.
"Betaw akak rukun Islam." "Yg tu yg ada 5 ke 6 yeh kak?"
"Crocodiles are reptiles,mammals or plants?" " PLANTS!"

A lot of children out there did not get the opportunities and supportive learning environment we did when we were smaller.
They are brilliant and active in nature but are slow to learn things in class. Maybe it's just motivation and support that is lacking. Kiutors play a role to send and reply postcards/letters, send presents when they excel in the exams (or get their first A!) and get them driven.

With a little push and guidance, Insha Allah, more children can become better people in dunia n akhirat.

Overseas uni students interested to have a kiutee from the KIUT programme,
please contact Daus at


Sunday, 9 August 2009

my cambodia snippet 2

A boy in a cooking pot, center of picture. Little boats like the one in the corner of the picture are the common transport of the poor along Tonle Sap.

A pot of guilt and regret.

We stumbled upon many beggars in Cambodia. Every time we eat lunch at a stall, there will be little children poking us, asking for money. After we finish our food, these children will swarm the table to eat our leftovers.

Allah...the first time this happened we were..speechless. Our toothpicks, our tissue papers were floating in our bowls. They simply removed them...and ate their hearts out.

Traumatized, we always offered fresh meals for the children beggars the next times we eat (a bowl of noodles isn't so pricey in Cambodia).

However, this boy was different.

We were on a boat along the Tonle Sap lake. As usual, "" can be heard all around. As we were to take off, this boy came rowing as fast as he can, crying for money. Crying. This, never happened. We gave him a little sum of money and we take off.

And he cried even harder, screaming for more. I was puzzled. But we already took off.

"Could it be that his mother is so sick, he needs money desperately?"
"When was the last time he ate?"

....why is he in a pot, shouldnt he be in a boat like every other poor beggars around?

I dont know anything about the boy but I knew he was desperate. And truly.....I could have given him more. I really.really could.

But there isnt a second chance, I dont think.

Still, I just cannot forget.


Wednesday, 5 August 2009

my cambodia snippet 1

roly, left in the picture.

Funny reality: I keep asking for light forgetting I already have the sun.

I know of a friend, Roly is his name. I'm sure everyone on the trip will remember him for life =). He is a fifth year medical student in USS, Cambodia. He's from a muslim village in Kampots(i'm not sure of the spelling) Province, where most men work as fishermen.

In his village, education commonly goes as far as primary school. And then, they are expected to share the responsibility to feed the family. Fishing is known to be hard work with not much gain in return.

But the child Roly wanted to study more. He had a different idea of how life should be. How education can help improve things. His parents werent happy. His grandparents disapproved. The people in the village shared his family's views too : Education is not important. Working for money to feed the family is.

This made Roly a stubborn child, always and always. He realized this. And he knew he was the only one. Still, he insisted to not want to work. He begged his family to give him 3 more years so he can finish high school.

So he spent teenage years cycling 20km to high school everyday during weekdays and fishing with his father during weekends. Whenever he wasn't studying hard, he worked hard.

Alhamdulillah, he was offered a scholarship to do medicine in USS from the Cambodian Government at the end of high school. He had to continue being "the stubborn one".

The scholarship only covers tuition fees so he needed money for a place to stay in Pnom Penh, food to eat as well as books to read.

His parents can only afford half of these expenses, having other siblings to take care of. Because of this, life was very hard in the first month before he managed to find himself a job. Two jobs to be precise.

He distributed newspapers in the early mornings, attend classes during the day and work at a restaurant from 5pm to 10pm. And everyone knows medicine calls for a lot of time reading too. So he sleeps whenever he can. As before, he studies hard when he isnt working hard.

Despite having two jobs, buying books is still a dream. Books from the library are limited so they cant be taken out. So he photostated books to read for this is the only "affordable" choice. But Alhamdulillah, he knew about IMAC, the Islamic Medical Association of Cambodia who referred him to IDB, the Islamic Developmental Bank. He received a small sum of money every month from IDB. However, in third year, more books are needed. Staying up late in the library isnt enough anymore as many references are in english yet medicine in USS is taught in french. So, he needs more time with books now to translate and study. Life gets more and more pressing for Roly.

"Sometimes I feel so tired I just want to pack up and return to my village." he said.

But he can't. He has pushed this far and he isn't coming back empty-handed, he told us.

Despite all this, he excelled in class. Throughout the length of our stay with him, he always received calls from his friends, asking him to explain something or another from the lectures. He leads a study group and managed to get a teaching job at a private school where he teaches anatomy and biology.

He spends his nights preparing for his own classes as well as the classes that he teaches. "Sometimes I don't sleep." said Roly. How he manages is beyond me.

Life is hard for Roly until today. But he knows that he is far from being most unfortunate. Allah has given him a very strong will to study and intelligence to come with that. He is the only person, the first person he likes to call it, who gets into university in his village. This calls for a show of thanks to Allah. He finds time to help in IMAC's medical and social relief to the poor to do circumcisions as well as mobile clinics. This is how we got to meet him in Kg. Cham.

He told us, one day he will return to serve and help the people of his village. Actions speak louder than words. Whatever he told them before about education, they dont pay attention to. So he really...really wants to prove to his people that education, in Allah's will, can bring success. A better life. He wants others to understand, to follow his footsteps. To know that success is possible to whoever who wants it. Be you the most poverty-stricken person or a rich man. The journey is a tough one but he wants to show others that he will make it. And others will too if they wish to.

And I thought. This is just one person. Amongst hundreds who disapprove. Roly was definitely just one person, but Allah chose him to be the one who changes others. And one person may be all it takes.

Allah...truly Ya Allah, I am embarassed with every time that I become I whined and how I sighed living a life full of ease.

Forgive me.